My Passion For Compassion

All of us are yearning for freedom to everything much in our finances. Most of us are walking dead everyday going to work in a suburb full of noise with all the chaos to start from getting up in bed until you get home retiring in your cold bed. Experiencing nightmares hunted by things related to office stuffs, its kind of funny but seriously? Things choking us all the time the face of those person always annoying you even when not doing anything but the moment their mouth is open calling your attention, its always like a whammy. Always trying to convince oneself from perhaps this will pass though its happening most often than not. Full of complaints here huh?

Instead of all this whining and no solution getting I stopped to breath, quitting my corporate job. Diving so deep. Originally I'm working in a contact center the first one is the biggest telecom in Australia, Aussie are lovely people I always say this to every job interview I deal with or with my co-workers because I mean it.

After three years I stopped and try to find a better job, a new one, some fresh air. We humans always try to look, hoping to find most suitable for us whence we are socio-political beings lot of similarities to creatures from the wild. Not far from our ego the way it was established when we are in our childhood period; Sigmund Freud. Not doing anything related to work-chaos simply embracing my self, encapsulating everything as a person with conscience and emotions. Have you heard either had read about an artist Vincent Willem van Gogh, committing his suicide, he failed and took him one or two days before he died due to his wound infection. Last words he use to say,'sadness will last forever', to his younger brother Theo, may both of them resting in peace. This story always leaves me a chill.

In any case you have come across to this guy story you may try to listen to: 'Summertime Sadness', sung by Lana Del Rey, though mind you not to do this if your emotionally and negatively charged. My point here is every now and then I am battling with my depression everything is fine and controllable. Its like lot of things coming in your head that most of the time its really hard to quit it. No, I am not smoking nor taking any kinds of illicit drugs, alcohol consumption yes but not like Amy 'Jade' Winehouse.

Going back from my second stanza, I am hired. My next job is still in contact center with this famous and huge digital service provider in America, I didn't expect it, really how horrible it was, poor people. I thought I was the poorest of the poor, emphasis is mine please. Did you know that in most corporate jobs an employee its always encouraged to forget whom you really was, by stop incorporating your emotions or else your manager either the upper management would see to handle you differently because it is what it is the management is doing it as well fair enough reason they get those position, now tell me do you want to be a manager in the future, oh don't lie a lot of copy-cats out there pressing it hard all the time just to get there. Am I wrong to make it sound nasty. Eighteen months after I can no longer feel my nerves in me; I'm sort of not a human working this way, I quit. However I always left my employer gracefully so I can still go back anytime whenever I wanted; its always a protocol for re-hiring an employee after a three months interval. The job interviewer always use to ask this,"...if you get hired how do you see yourself in this company after three or five years?" Its a pain in the brain to give pretended answers to questions your not comfortable. Science based psychologist, degree holders, always use to mentioned that an employee whom can fit is the one on the brighter side obviously speaking the 'one' that a company can benefit the most.

And this is how I remember which I use to blog before in 2009. Setting aside from drawing sketches and abstract paintings back in my college year, year 2003, which I always utilize as a therapy to release my unspoken yet unwanted emotions, gardening is the other way if your into plants, or any other means relevance to arts. Many of us don't know this trick reason many get married early or commit unwanted pregnancy now you know these share it with your younger ones. Have you ever feel this feeling that your working in a city, earning enough money to save all your monthly bills, pay all the debts, entertain yourself with your friends, going to different theme parks or to a movie theaters two or three times a month, go buy new stuff with branded clothing, upgraded gadgets, stylish and iconic shoes whatever footwear it is, hence not yet enough seems like your still alone and craving. This is how we always look for holes to release ourselves some were into extremes letting those their shadow grow bigger than them to a moment its uncontrollable afterwards destroyed, zombiefied in asylum or end up in morgue. I do find a lot of this people in social media cannot help themselves which can no longer be a good stream especially to our new and young generations. If your not convinced with this then how young is a person in your community committed a rape, in drug addiction, or involved in stealing. Now who is the one that can really last the one that practiced to fake things or the person trying all the best to be real.

I have been once into some form of addiction its not to say I feel lucky nor fortunate despite the fact with this depression from time to time its peaking. We suppose to always reiterate making it a habit being a creative in obtaining answers if not look for a professional help. Stop looking in someone else window; Johnny Depp. Pressured and forced instead working on how to polish those rigid edges in your life. Never get tired of starting a new one and settle from it, be brave to stand up from the rest.

I am no good neither pro in life or in career however this everyday life battles to realized facing it wholeheartedly, contented, growing gracefully day by day. In comparing with a sunflower scourged in the slaughtering heat of the sun, or to an edelweiss. Upon reading all the words from this letter am I a good literature now?

I am not counting on anyone for a yes or no, that is not the purpose of this article though it is to open our heads together to see and able to grasp the stones underneath this clear water.

This is a random thought I made again today. I didn't think that I will take another three hours to wrote this post, mind you I'm from yesterday night editorial blogging things although its tiring however I am happy doing it. Have some bargains or an acquiescence mail at qolfera@gmail.com.

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